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"Thinking Inside The Box"

I'm a word guy. 
I listen to exactly what people say, 
and if what they say becomes important, 
I evaluate their words from every angle. 
Misty is the opposite. 
She just hears what you MEAN. 

Somebody said 
"Friends come in and out of our lives 
like busboys in a busy restaurant." 
I wish I could say it better, but I can't. 

I care a lot about friendships 
and I try to hang on to them for life, 
but they seem to change or fade. 
Some are renewed later in time. 
I always welcome them back. 

All relationships have a honeymoon period 
which fades and changes into something else... 
Maybe better. Maybe not. 

The life of the honeymoon can be affected by these: 
High expectations in the beginning, 
Familiarity allowing us to see each other's faults, 
A need to control, 
Novelty wearing off, 
Other matters requiring our time and attention, 
Running out of common interests, 
and, basically, things change. 

The honeymoon period applies to: 
Romantic relationships and marriage, 
business and job relationships, 
parents and children, 
family, friends, neighbors, 
celebrities, politicians, music, 
styles, tastes, and life in general. 
One exception is pets. 
Most pets, especially dogs, are loving and loyal for life. 

After getting beyond the honeymoon, 
relationships can become something more real and lasting. 

We all enjoy the honeymoons, 
and the only reason I even think about this subject 
is so that I don't give away my whole self too soon. 

I feel a little guilt when I don't answer a letter or email, 
and I do respond to as many as I can, 
but there just isn't enough time in my life to do everything. 
It's sort of a triage, 
and our music, personal quests, 
daily jobs, and problems, need to be treated first. 

I used to be hooked on the past. 
I could sit in a chair 
and mentally visualize every detail of my grandmother's house 
as it was in my childhood. 
That's good for songwriting, 
but now I can get in and out of that mood when I want. 

I still have trouble living in the present, 
and so I miss a lot of life. 
Living in the future has been another of my obsessions. 
Constant planning could be due to a basic insecurity. 

To get into the present, 
I've started taking walks near sunset, 
and paying attention to nature, 
and the sights, sounds, and smells. 
I guess most people do this every day, 
but to me it's better than Disney World. 

On my walks, I often sit briefly and talk with people, 
or just sit with them. 
We don't have to impress each other, 
and there aren't any big expectations. 
I pet cats and dogs along the way. 
It's kinda fun. 

I like some music of almost every kind. 
I can't explain why I like certain music, 
except that it has to be done sincerely, 
and by talented artists. 
It either hits me or it doesn't, 
regardless of style. 

I don't like arguments 
about which kinds of music are great or lousy, 
and which musical era should be the only one. 
Musicians live, compose, and play music. 
Fans debate it. 

Writing my column is good therapy for me. 
Shrinks are expensive. 

Copyright  October 16, 2005, Jack Blanchard. All rights reserved. 
Reprinted by permission. 


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